Exceptional Dental Practice Management

Oh...The Humanity

                                                                                                                              

Human beings are interesting.  We all want understanding and compassion for ourselves, but sometimes it is so hard to extend either to our fellow humans.  We had a patient today who needed a crown.  We told him that a year ago.  Well, he didn't agree then and went on to develop irreversible pulpitis resulting in the need for a root canal.  So today we got to prep for the crown.  This guy is very blustery and loves to tell you how smart he is.  He tends to tell off color jokes and tries very hard to impress.  He's loud, he gags, he talks while your finger or the dentist's handpiece are in his mouth and it takes at least 30% longer to complete his treatment than the average human's.      I will admit, I cringe a little when I see his name on the schedule.  As he was talking today I noticed how desperate he seemed.  I realized he was just desperate to impress, he was desperate to be heard and accepted.  He's used to people being turned off by him, he even mentioned it.  He just doesn't know what to change to make it stop.  What I really saw was his humanity.  And reflected in his humanity, I saw my own.  Then I could give him what he needed.  Yes, I am repulsed when I hold an impression and the patient talks with my hand in his mouth for four minutes.  The gagging and bragging don't do much for me either.  But, when I listened to him and accepted that he needed to tell me something, or at least that he needed to be heard, I could relax and stop fighting the the need to accept this person as just another human.  I could put aside my likes and dislikes and just let him be.  Because that's what I want, too.  I want to be liked just as I am in this moment in time.  I don't want it to depend on me fixing something about myself or changing.  I don't want it to matter where I was born, what religion I am, what color my hair is, or what level of education I've achieved.  That's who we all are.  That's who my patient is, my husband, my children, my friends, my boss, my co-workers and that's who you are.  We are just humanity.  We're good enough to be loved just like we are.

Mentoring = You Squared

 

                                                                                           
One of the most generous things you can do with your talent and the skills you've acquired over the years is teach them to someone else.    There is a lot of satisfaction in seeing a person who is coming into the profession that you love, learn to love it as well.  Knowing that you are helping her achieve the knowledge and abilities that she needs to succeed is a gift for both of you. 
    It is interesting to see the new approaches the person you are teaching may take when performing the tasks that have become second nature to you.  You may even find yourself learning a few new tricks while you're at it.  It's important to be patient and let them try things in a different way even though you may feel that your way is best.  Best for you may not be best for them. 
    One thing you shouldn't expect from yourself is to be a fairy godmother to the new person.  There will be times when you have to be demanding and exacting so that they can learn the correct way to do things and the importance of thoroughness and precision.  You can approach these situations kindly, but sometimes you need to be firm and clear.
    We have a new assistant that is excited about dental assisting which in itself is something to treasure.  So many young women come into assisting seeing it as a stepping stone to dental hygiene.  There is nothing wrong with experiencing assisting on the way to hygiene, but we need to keep some talented, dedicated people in assisting.  You can help by being a generous, caring mentor to someone who is interested in dental assisting.  You lose nothing when you give of yourself and your talents.  You just double the benefit of what you hold by handing it to someone else.  Actually, assuming that they will go on to teach another, the value of what you can give is immeasurable.                                                                                                                                                                                                              

Help! I Need Somebody...Sometimes

    A few days ago I wrote about what a difficult job the receptionist has in the dental office.  I bet everyone thinks they've got it pretty tough.  They're absolutely right...sometimes.  Everybody faces dilemmas and demands in their job now and then.  Since I began managing our practice three years ago I discovered that it's much harder than I thought it would be...sometimes.  And then sometimes it's great.  But when it's hard it can be really hard. 
    Think about it.  Who does the manager have to go to?  When things get overwhelming who can she dump it all on?  Her boss?  No, not a great idea, that's part of what he's trying to avoid by having a manager.  The staff?  Nah, you'll just confuse them and regret it later.  Go home and gripe to your family?  Sure, they'll love that.  Not!
    So what's a manager to do?  If she's there to serve, who serves her?  There's the answer.  While it's not a good idea to gripe and complain, it's perfectly acceptable to ask for help.  When you ask the people that you lead for help, you make leaders out of them as well.  That doesn't undermine your own leadership, it enhances it.  Think about how you feel when someone asks you for help solving a problem or completing a task.  It probably makes you feel competant.  That in turn builds your own confidence and self-esteem.  So, if you do that with the people you lead you will find yourself leading confident people who believe in their abilities.  That's a lot better than trying to lead people who have low self-esteem and who are so timid about making decisions that they have to check with you before completing each step of a task.  When you show the staff that you are comfortable with their abilities and that you trust them to do the right thing, often they will.
    When a manager has a problem with her manager or another staff member then she really is at a loss in the practice if she needs a shoulder to cry on.  She's at a loss in the community, too.  You can't go around telling everyone how unreasonable your boss was today because tomorrow it may have spread to half the practices in town.  So you have to keep your own counsel, complain to your spouse  or family, or you can tell me all about it here.  Part of the reason I write this weblog is to help people avoid making the mistakes I've made and to share the good things I learn along the way.  If I can be a sounding board for someone having a problem, then go ahead and think of me as your personal Dear Abby.  I know it's hard sometimes and it can be a confusing and lonely position.  It's full of frustration and stress, but it's a huge compliment to be asked to run someone's practice.  It's incredibly satisfying to watch someone you've trained in a position take off on their own.  Then it's great to see them share what they learned from you with the next person.  It's fulfilling to see the things that you discuss at staff meetings put into practice with the patients and the team.  It's all worth it when your boss thanks you for a wonderful job and wonders what he ever did without you.  When negative thoughts come along it's important to balance them with all the wonderful things about leading a group of caring people dedicated to helping others.  So, hang in there, ask for help when you need it or come here and leave a comment and I, and anyone else who cares to, will tell you what we think.

Everybody Has a Hungry Heart

    As a manager, one of the most important thing you can do for the people you manage is to spend time really listening to them.  You don't have to like what they say, do what they say or agree with what they say.  They may not even care if you do.  You just need to listen and really want to hear. 
    We all go through life needing.  We need to be accepted, to be loved, to be wanted, to be cared about and to be heard.  That's the basics.  We have to have those things to be OK.  We may want a lot of other things, but we don't need them.  Our goal, as managers, is to build strong teams of good, healthy people.  We can make an enormous difference in a team members life if we will spend time listening to them.  Even better, ask them what they think and then listen.  Let them express themselves without worry of reprisal, judgment or analysis. They are entitled to have ideas and give suggestions.  It doesn't hurt to listen to them and it doesn't mean you have to change what you were going to do.  I remember when I was younger and had just had my first child.  She was my Mother's first granddaughter and to say she adored her would be an understatement.  My Mother liked to express her opinion on everything from when she should have solid food to what she should wear for her first Easter.  I used to get frustrated and feel intruded upon with all those suggestions.  I loved my Mother, but I resented all the advice.  Thankfully, the thought occurred to me that she could give me as much advice as she needed to, and in turn, I could listen.  Then I could do as I pleased.  My Mother didn't say anything when I showed up with my daughter in a different Easter outfit than she had suggested.  How could she?  That little angel looked adorable in anything.  The point is she felt heard and that I cared enough to let her have her say. That's enough for most people.
    Sometimes we worry about a team member who doesn't seem to be  keeping up or trying very hard.  The first thing to do is ask why.  The second thing is to listen to the answer.  Sometimes just knowing you care and want to help will re-energize the employee.  Sometimes you can discover things you didn't know about that you can help with.  Other times you may discover that you need to encourage this person to find a job that fits them better.  It all starts with listening. 
    Another important thing to do is to try to understand.  That's called empathy.  Trying to understand what someone else is going through or what their life is like.  We don't all have the life we envisioned for ourselves.  My husband travels 80% of the time.  I'd rather have him home, but I'm good at coping with it.  Not everybody copes well with their disappointments.  Some people are devastated by solitude.  I have a friend whose behavior was aggravating me to the point that I thought I'd have to distance myself from her.  Then I tried to understand what might be driving her behavior.  She's lonely, desperately lonely.  I can't feel what she feels because being alone doesn't affect me the same way it affects her, but I can understand her disappointment and frustration.  That enables me to let her behavior just be part of the package she brings to friendship.  We don't always enjoy all the people we manage.  We probably wouldn't necessarily choose to spend this much time around them in a non-work environment.  But, we must strive for understanding and empathy and if nothing else to realize that just like us they too, have a hungry heart.  Then we can know how to do our job for them.

The Keys To The Kingdom

    There are many days when managing a practice can seem overwhelming or even thankless.  It's kind of like cleaning the bathroom.  You get it just right and everybody starts messing it up again.  But, on those days when it's just right, it feels great.  Sometimes other people in the family start noticing how much nicer it is when it's just right and they do things to help keep it that way.  That tells you they care about something more than what's in it for them. 
    That's how it is sometimes with a dental practice.  You can feel like you're running around all day putting out fires and more fires are cropping up in new places.  By the end of the day the only thing you've accomplished is avoiding catastrophes and keeping the chaos to a minimum.  Those days don't seem very rewarding, but they're actually developmental milestones.  They help you discover what needs exist in the practice as well as the problems.  They also show you where the strengths of the practice are.  If you're smart, you'll pay attention to that and look at it as a necessary step in improving the practice.
    We've been through some hits and misses on the way to building our team.  I hate the misses because they affect so many people.  When a staff member is not right for the position it's hard to face that decision and the staff and the employee are hurt.  It's unavoidable. That's why it's important to try to ask the right questions at the interview and why it's important for the candidate to be honest with their answers.  The truth always comes out and that's when problems begin.
    I love the hits.  It is so satisfying to see someone step into a position that they are just right for.  It enhances the whole team and uplifts the practice.  That's when the wheel can really start turning because everyone is in place working well together.  That's when a manager can focus on developing the team and the practice.  When she can focus and stop worrying about whether people will do what's expected, she can make the practice hum and see that the patients get what they need.  Whether times are good or bad, it's up to the manager to make it all work.  She holds the keys to the kingdom in her hand and she must keep trying to unlock all the doors that lead to success.

Just Live

    Managing anyone beside your self can be challenging.  First you have to be sure you are going into it for the right reasons.  Don't do it to feel important, you're bound to be tripped up and shown how insignificant you really are in the general scheme of things.  Don't do it to have control, nobody will let you control them if they have a choice, even if that choice is to quit.  Do it because you want to serve.  That's a great beginning. 
    Now, what character traits will you need?  Selflessness, generosity of spirit, patience, kindness, interest in others, the ability to prioritize, discernment and the ability to get out of your box when dealing with others.  That means you can look at them as they really are, not as you react to them.  You have to be able to look at an employee and accept them as they are at that moment in time.  Then you have to decide if they can do the job.  You have to be able to separate the characteristics of their personality traits from their ability to do the job.  If you like them and they are able to perform well, that's a great situation for you.  If you don't like some of their personality quirks, but they can do the job, you have to honestly decide whether their personality is detrimental to the team, practice and patients or just something that bugs you.  If it just bugs you, find a way to deal with it.  Now, if you like them, but they just can't do the job, you have to have the guts and ego to admit it.  Guts because it's hard to dismiss someone you like.  Ego because it's hard to admit you can't make it work.  Trying to force someone to develop abilities they don't have or don't want to possess hurts and stresses everyone.  In the long run you can diminish the employee's self-esteem even though you thought you were trying to improve them.  Accept them as they are even if that means accepting that they have to go.  When you try to change someone who can't change you may start to resent them and find yourself developing a dislike of them and letting them feel that.  That can make them feel belittled and ruin their confidence.  It makes you a poor manager.  The friend who inspired this post is a believer in the Serenity Prayer:

    Give me the courage to change the things I can,
    The serenity to accept the things I can't,
    And the wisdom to know the difference.

I'm not saying you can't help team members develop stronger or new skills, I'm saying that you can't force them to develop anything.  Use your wisdom and realize and accept it when you can't.  When you think someone isn't doing something the way you think they should, or the way you would, get out of your box.  Really look at what they are doing and honestly evaluate it.  If the job is getting done, it's OK if they do it differently than you would.  If it's not, make a correction and be done with it.  Then move on.  The pursuit of excellence is good, but not if it leads to judging others.  You can't force anyone else to pursue excellence, nor can you define it for them.  You can only do that as it applies to your behavior and performance.  It would be irrational to believe otherwise.  Learn to exist together and just live.

Will You Please Just Listen?

    What is the one of the most important things a manager can do for her team, her boss or her patients?  I'm sure there are as many answers as there are people reading this.  We all have our own perception of what is important.  That perception is usually an extension of what is important to us.  So you may answer that it's important to fix things, to make sure everyone is happy, to direct the action, to keep things running, etc.  But, there is one thing you must do well to do everything else well.  It is one of the most difficult things you may be called upon to do.  It is simply, to listen. 
    I know that's something that most of us can do, but I'm not talking about the ability to hear, I'm talking about the gift of listening.  When you listen well, you almost become a part of the journey of the sound.  Think about listening to music that you love.  If you close your eyes you may even find yourself swaying and lost in the music.  Now, think about how you listen to someone else.  Don't you find yourself taking what they're saying and mentally comparing it with experiences you've had?  You probably feel helpful when you can come up with a antidote from your own life to compare to what they're telling you.   That's usually not all that helpful.  While you're giving your recitation they may be fuming at having their moment pulled over to you.  You just made their story your story.  You didn't make it a shared experience; you couldn't because that's not what it is. It is their's and their's alone.  They want to share how they felt about it with you.
    People are all different in the way they communicate and receive communication.  It is probably the biggest stumbling block between people in any circumstance.  When someone tells another person something that is important to them, they are trusting that person to receive it in kindness and love.  If they didn't believe that, they wouldn't take the chance.  Receivers, for the most part, tend to panic.  They wonder what they can say that will make a good impact, they wonder what the speaker wants from them, they worry that whatever they say won't be good enough or may make matters worse, and in the worst case, they take the meaning of what the speaker is saying and warp it into an insult or an attack.  In the end, both may leave feeling bruised, misunderstood and unappreciated. 
    How can we avoid this?  By just being present and being quiet.  By doing nothing but listening and thinking only about what they are saying to you.  Don't analyze as the words are spoken.  Listen to the melody first.  If there is pain hear it, maybe even feel it, but don't compare it with your own.  Don't worry too much about clarifying right away, just let them speak.  When you stop someone to say, "I think this is what I hear you saying..."  you are analyzing and preparing your reply, you've stopped really listening.
    Letting a person who is upset, or hurt, or frightened have their say without interrupting is a gift you give to them.  You are telling them that they are worth your time and attention.  You may save yourself some time as well as helping them.  If you are the kind of manager that your staff admires and looks up to, then they want to be heard and understood by you.  If they think you've got them wrong, they'll keep coming back and trying to help you get them right.  People want to be understood by the people that matter to them.  If you can relax and go with the act of really listening you may learn things that will help you do your job better.  You may realize the quality and depth of the people around you.  Don't worry that you may listen to something you won't like. If it's not true, that's OK, they have a right to their opinion and you can give an explanation if you want to once they are finished speaking.  If they are right, you may even thank them for caring enough to tell you.  An unpleasant truth is usually more productive than insincere flattery.  It takes trust and courage to tell someone something they may not like.  In the end, that's how honest relationships are built.  No one said it would be easy.  If the other person is confused or dealing with a painful situation, don't feel that you have to fix it, just let them know you're there for them and that you're sorry they're suffering.  Sometimes that's all they're looking for.  Again, if you stop making it about yourself you can truly just listen and be there for them.  Most of the time, that's enough.

It's All Right, Really!

    Mistakes.  We all make them.  It's that human thing.  So why does everybody seem to be so terrified of making one?  It's absolutely paralyzing for some people.  Well, as someone who makes them all the time, I'm here to tell you, you'll survive.  Better than that, you'll thrive.  As long as your mistake doesn't involve a criminal offense, the most that will suffer is usually your ego.
    When you think about the ladder of success, think about the rungs of the ladder as alternating achievements and mistakes.  Mistakes can reinforce the learning.  Sometimes by doing something wrong, you can see the reason for doing it right.  Today, one of our staff was going to fill the plaster bin.  We've done it together a few times, but she wanted me to watch her do it so she didn't make a mistake.  Since I can't twitch my nose to keep something from going wrong, the mere act of me watching wouldn't change the course of history in the making here.  So I watched.  A little plaster puffed out the side, but all in all, a successful mission.  What's the worst that could have happened?  A lot of plaster could have escaped, she could have dropped the bag?  We'd have lived.  She'd have cleaned it up and 10 minutes later it would have been a blip on my memory's radar.  She has my permission to fail at filling the plaster trap.  If she failed every time, she'd have my permission to talk someone else into doing it.  I'd accept that it wasn't her forte.  We'd go forward.
    Fear of failure prevents progress, success and stunts potential.  It is easy to accept mediocrity in one's self, but doing that steals from the future.  By the time the effect is realized, something has been lost.  People accept mediocrity because it demands so little and seems safer.  That is a misconception.  Mediocrity mires a person in low self-esteem and results in missed opportunities.  A mistake is just a stepping stone to accomplishment.  Mistakes made with nobility can be inspiring.  By that I mean, if you make a mistake and admit it, ask for help and heed the advice given to you, you've ennobled yourself for future success. 
    Next time you feel a familiar hesitancy about trying something new, attempting the next step in a process or are worried about messing up; ask yourself what is the worst that can happen?  Then figure out what you can do in response to the worst that can happen.  If you really need help, get it.  Otherwise make a mistake now and then.  You will go far beyond mediocrity and may even become an expert at something.  If anybody gives you a hard time about your mistakes, suck it up and remember that you had the courage to try.
    If you are managing someone that is afraid to mess up, figure out why.  If they don't believe in themself, make them understand that you believe in their potential.  And you must really believe, you owe it to them if you are going to ask them to expand themself.  Think of the gift you are offering them.  The most important thing you can do for someone you manage is to believe in their potential and help them see it and realize it.  Once they do, you must let them own it.  Don't take the credit for their achievement, not one bit of it.  Someone believed enough in you to hand you their practice to manage, you are just paying it forward.  Got that?  If you really want to practice servant leadership, you develop winners, lead them to the winner's circle, and back quietly away.  It's their time to shine.

Ask And You Shall Receive

    As you probably noticed from recent posts, I've had a dilemma to deal with lately.  How to motivate a team member who seemed more intent on defending lackluster performance and failure to advance, than to listen to what I was telling her.  I found my answer in Tammy Lenski's post on her weblog "I Can't Say That" here.   Tammy talks about asking questions and understanding the other person.  I admit it, I don't understand why someone doesn't want to improve.  I did ask questions, but in retrospect, probably in a way that made her defensive.  The reason is that I've tried before with this person and it went the same way.  So I get a little nervous sometimes, too.
    I was taken to task by one reader who feels I am confusing.  He says it sounds like a different staff from day to day.  I can see why he says that.  When I look at our team strictly as people, they are fantastic human beings.  That's my social mind thinking.  When I look at them critically with my business mind, I see beyond simple niceness, and have to ask myself, "Is this person doing the job the best it can be done or to the best of their ability?"  Different answer.  So, I try to consider the niceness factor and that makes me want to help the person develop the business part of them self.  Reading Tammy's post helps me see a different approach.  One question she suggests is, "What can we do to support you in making this change?"  I think asking that might make the person feel more a part of the solution and not like a victim.  She also suggests that the person requesting the change might discover some changes they need to make themselves.  Undoubtedly, I will.  I always do.  Adversity is a great growth opportunity if you can stand to look reality in the face and yourself in the mirror. 
    So thanks Tammy for writing that article right when I needed to read it.  Isn't great how that seems to happen.  And thanks to Isaac, also.  I spent a lot of time, off and on today, thinking about your comment. It bothered me so there must be some truth in it.  I don't agree with you completely, but I see your point and I'm glad you were interested enough to take the time to comment at all.  It's all about the dialog.  We don't learn anything if we agree with everyone all the time.  Food for thought keeps the brain growing.  When we know better, we do better.

You Can Change The Past

    Yesterday I wrote about motivating the unmotivated.  I had another thought.  Today I tried to motivate someone and it wasn't accepted very well.  It was upsetting to the other person and to me.  My intention was to point out that I believe in that person's potential to improve.  That message was not allowed in.  The defense was ready to rebut.  The immediate response from that person was resignation to failure and hopelessness.  I could feel a weight bear down on my shoulders because this was not going to be a path we would walk together.  It will be a bumpy road, full of potholes and pitfalls.  I will be dragging, threatening, berating, and bribing this person along.  Not so fast.  I won't do that. 
    I have long believed that most people do the best they can with what they have in their experience in life so far.  So this person may have experienced belittling remarks, threats, embarrassment and defeat long before I ever came along.  Maybe that's what the past has taught them to expect.  But I can start a new past experience for her.  Tomorrow what happened today will be part of the past.  After my initial attempt at discussion, I did go back and say I wish she could understand that it is a positive thing to receive feedback and have expectations expressed.  It means somebody believes in your ability to improve.  So, maybe tomorrow, that past will be a part of her experience.  If I come at the challenge every day from a positive, patient approach, maybe that will make the difference and create a better past.  There are many approaches to problems.  Sometimes, after a stressful day like today, I can see the possible solutions much more clearly in the comfort and relaxation of home.   So now I know what I will try to do next.  I will attempt to change the past and affect a better future.

Motivating The Unmotivated

    This is, hands down, the most challenging thing about managing for me.  I just realized why; it's because I don't understand it and I can't relate to it.  Or can I?  I see myself as a highly motivated person in most areas of my life.  Maybe I just found my Achilles heel.  I'm not motivated to motivate the unmotivated.  I'm gung-ho when I think the will is there, but when I discover a basic lack of interest in progressing, I lose interest in progressing.  It actually annoys me to try to deal with someone who could care less.  Why?  I mean really, why does that annoy me? 
     Maybe it's because as that person's manager I feel their failure to progress as my failure to lead them into progress.  Maybe, I hate the waste it represents.  Waste of time, waste of my energy, waste of money, waste of the employee's potential.  Maybe I'm afraid I'll try to help them some more and end up in the same place, stalled in the slow lane.  And more waste.
     Are we afraid of what we don't understand?  Do I worry that to understand it I'll have to 'descend' into that mindset and might get stuck there?  Nah, I'm too type A for that.  So what can a manager do when they are faced with a team member that isn't pulling their weight and doesn't seem fazed by it?  There are a few options.  You can set goals and state expectations.  Been there, done that?  You can issue ultimatums, but are you ready to follow through and then deal with the fall out?  I guarantee you there will be unforeseen issues that result that will make to want to crawl under your blanket and stay there.  You can try to involve the rest of the team in the rehabilitation effort.  That's a good one, but tricky, you have to figure out a way to do that without violating the staff member's privacy.  You can't say, "Hey, look guys, Joanie's slacking off is going to cost her her job if we don't do something."  You can put yourself in her place and ask yourself why you would be unmotivated and what would begin to motivate you.  That's probably most effective. 
     I think you have to make an accounting of the staff member's good and bad qualities and decide which weighs heavier.  Once decided, find the course of action you think will work and doggedly pursue it.  At least you'll know you tried your hardest.  You may even make a huge change in another person's life.  If you can motivate an unmotivated person you will give them a path to their own potential and a little shove in the right direction. That's a gift that keeps on giving.  That would really be something to celebrate.

But, It's Just Not Fair!

     Servant leadership is all about doing what needs to done so that the mission chosen by your group is upheld.  Sometimes it's easy to see what needs to be done and how to serve.  Sometimes it's not.  There are times it can be frustrating to be part of a group that is dedicated to a serving profession, like dentistry.  You may be giving it your best all day while someone else is taking it as easy as they can get away with.  It can distract you from your goals and your mission.  But, only if you let it. 

     Think about it.  Who are you serving and what are you trying to accomplish?  You're serving your patient and you are trying to help them attain better health.  You're not serving the employee who is surfing the web while you're working steadily.  No matter what she's doing, she can't stop you from your goal.  She could lighten your load if she'd help but she can't stop you by not helping.  Who does she diminish?  Not you, she can't touch you.  Herself?  Maybe, but that's really none of your business is it?  Why doesn't the boss care?  How do you know he doesn't, but what is important to you may not be to him.  Maybe he figures that's all he's going to get from her and can accept that.  Maybe he's thanking his lucky stars for you.  Or maybe he's not thinking about it at all.  Most likely that's the case.  But you're driving yourself crazy, right?

     So why are you?  Because you want justice, don't you?  It's just not fair, is it?  What would justice look like?  The lazy chick losing her job?  Will that make everything right in your world?  Maybe seeing her get chewed out would make you feel better.  I doubt it.  What you really want is some recognition.  Because you are working so hard!  Well, you recognize it.  Let that be enough.  Be happy with the personal satisfaction you get from doing a good job and doing the right thing.  Mind your own backyard.  Maybe someday, you'll be her inspiration.  Well, maybe not, but you'll probably be somebody's.  Most of all, your patients will benefit from what you do and how you care.  And isn't that how the whole thing started?

You Say You Want A Revolution

     What should you expect if you accept a leadership position in the dental practice you work in?  Nothing.  That's right, you heard me, nothing.  Zilch, nada, not a thing.  Sounds bad?  Then leadership may not be for you, it ain't for sissies.  Why would I say something like that?  It sounds terrible, doesn't it?  Do you think maybe I just had a bad day?  Well, parts of it were great, parts of it were fun, some were frustrating but all in all a pretty good day.  I guess that's not it.  So what am I talking about?
     When you choose to become a leader, you choose to serve.  When you choose to serve you choose to provide, supply and attend to.  No whining, you had a choice.  When you became a leader, you became a harbinger of all things good and bad, you are the maestro of the schedule, the pacesetter of the day and the supporter of the team.
      Why should that all be the manager's responsibility?  Because, you chose it, you agreed to it, you probably wanted it.  Right?  So, sure, you have a receptionist, but it's your responsibility to make sure the schedule is as it should be.  You know what the dentist wants and likes, you have to make it happen.  If she gets it wrong, you have to make it right.  Why should you have to set the pace for the day?  Somebody has to, you raised your hand so do it.  People generally like to move at a relaxed pace, that doesn't make them bad or lazy.  Sometimes you have to take it up a notch, so get moving and put the pressure on.  Throughout the day, every day, somebody's going to need help and encouragement.  You supply that. Your boss saw something in you and trusted you to guide his practice through whatever comes your way.  He knows you have it in you, or at least he's pretty sure you do, so if you don't have it, get it or give it up.
     Maybe you're confused.  Maybe you just wanted to be a manager.  OK, do that.  You get to tell people what to do and tell them off if they don't do it.  You're the head honcho, the big kahuna, the BOSS.  Yeah, you're not going to last long, either, so enjoy it now.  On the other hand,  maybe you really want to serve as a leader.  Now, that's a different thing altogether.  A leader leads by example.  You influence people into working hard, too.  You show them how you treat the patients and how you treat others.  You make it something they want to do, also.  Then you make leaders out of all of them.  That is your reward.
     A few people have told me that being a leader is lonely.  Sometimes it is.  Sometimes it would be nice to be the person being encouraged and complimented.  It would be a break to leave at the end of the day without any cares about the next day, week or month.  To shrug off responsibility, to take a hiatus from constantly trying to improve so you can lead better.  But, that wouldn't be you, would it? 
     How do you know you're ready for it?  Here are three questions from James C. Hunters book The World's Most Powerful Leadership Principle - How To Become a Servant Leader. 

1.  Are you truly committed to personal continuous improvement and being a more effective leader?  If your answer is yes, then you must understand that personal change will be required in order to accomplish this.
2. Can your ego handle receiving feedback, even emotionally painful feedback, from others, including subordinates, to better determine the gaps between where you are now as a leader versus where you need to be?
3. Are you willing to do the necessary work, take the necessary risks, and suffer the necessary pain in order to close the gaps between where you are now and where you need to be as a leader?   

    If your answer is yes, I suggest you read this book.  Over and over again.  I'll probably read mine till the pages wear out and I still won't close the gap all the way.  Because the more I can change and improve, the more I'll be required to.  And the gap will widen again.   I'm working on handling frustration better right now.  I've got a long list of things to work on.  That's one of the things I like about this job...the opportunity for the revolution of my character.  That's the bonus.

         

The Fourth Question

   " What problems have we created?"  That's the fourth and final question in "The Four Questions Every Leader Must Ask" .  What an interesting question!  I thought we were trying to make things better, so how can we have created problems? 
    Every yin has it's yang.  For every action there is an equal and opposite reaction.  You go two steps forward and one step back.  There are enough cliches that relate to this so there must be something to it.
    What it amounts to is periodically sitting back and evaluating what we are doing.  Not everything is going to be perfect.  Some good things can still be good even if they expose a problem to be dealt with.  I encourage you to see problems as opportunities to learn and increase in strength.  Learn to see problems as separate from you as a person so that you can stop defending them (yourself) and start solving them.  Depersonalizing problems automatically makes them smaller and less threatening.
    So what problems could we create in a dental practice by looking at our impact and opportunities?  We could realize that we are understaffed.  We could see that we have some character issues that need to be worked on.  Maybe we see that some things we routinely do are not productive and need to be changed.  There are many possibilities.  Possibility is the key word.  Possibilities are opportunities for increase and opening.  That brings more interest and enthusiasm. 
    Problems challenge us to expand our thinking and that could result in new ideas that we wouldn't have come up with if we didn't have a problem.  So, problems bring growth.  Problems challenge our minds, hearts and souls to action.  They are the bugle call to wake up and get moving in the right direction.  Without problems, you can see where you could stagnate.  Problems, who needs 'em?  Anybody who wants to keep on improving and increasing their potential, that's who!

Positively Positive

   

    Have you ever listened to someone who was feeling bad about their life or themself talk?  No wonder they feel so bad, listen to what they think of themself!  As a manager, I think I am more in tune to it than I was when I was one of the staff.  I guess I care more about caring for the staff.  I'm asking them to give more than they might on their own and in turn I feel a responsibility to them.  I want them to be OK. 
    Negative talk about one's self is like bad gossip.  It paints a picture in the mind of the listener that doesn't make the them attracted to the subject of the gossip.  So, why would someone do that?  My theory, and remember it's a very amateur theory, is that they desperately want to have their negative view of themselves proved wrong.  They also need to see and hear about what other's believe them to be.  They are hoping they are wrong about themself and want someone to validate that hope.
    Can someone else really do that for a person?  Short-term, yes, to a degree.  But, it doesn't stick unless the person can find a different way to think.  Otherwise the first bit of evidence that their original opinion was right will dead drop them right back into negativity.
    So what can we as managers or bosses do to help?  Guide them to new ways to think.  There are many different ways to do this and sometimes just putting new opportunities in front of them is all is takes.  It depends on their self-motivation.  Creative visualization may be one way to approach the problem.  Steve Pavlina talks about this on his personal development blog.  Even if all the ideas there aren't right for you, he makes a lot of sense to me.  Norman Vincent Peale wrote "The Power of Positive Thinking".  Jack Canfield wrote "The Success Principles".  Both of those books have a powerful message of how to bing more positivity into your life.  I have a friend that I can actually see go into her "I'm no good" frame of mind.  I don't let up on her.  I won't sit there and let her away with bashing my friend.  That, I believe is key.  Hold the person accountable for what they are saying and what that is creating.  Show them tools that can help them change that.  Then step back and let them work on it.  Don't hover, don't mother, don't smother.  Believe in their capability to help themself.  Let them have the glory of success.  Be a gentle nudge, or if need be, a swift kick in the you know what.  Just don't be an enabler or a controller.  Then you'll just add to the problem.  Because if for some reason, you're not there anymore, the whole thing collapses.  With the subject being a person, nobody can afford to risk that.
    You serve your staff, the practice and the patients best when you help them see and believe in their own goodness and capability.  Mirror what you see in them until they know it's true.  Don't give up!  It's frustrating sometimes, especially when things seem to be better and then they nosedive.  Be patient, sometimes people have to go back and try on their old ways of thinking to be sure they don't want to go there again.  They come back to what feels better.  That is the reward of servant leadership.

The Third Question

  I didn't forget, I just got busy.  But I'm back now to talk about the third question:  What opportunities do we have now?  I like that question, it's an easy one.  We have a ton of opportunities!

    Most important is the opportunity we have to make a difference in the lives of our patients.  We can help them smile proudly rather than hiding behind their hand because they're ashamed of how they look.  We can help them improve their self-esteem and by doing so even help them improve their financial status.  Confidence is an attractive quality and many employers want that in the people they hire.  We can help them improve their health by giving them the ability to eat foods that are better for them.  Just helping alleviate their fear of the dentist can be a big relief for some people.  For others, knowing someone cares about what happens to them is all it takes to make them care more about themselves.
    We have the opportunity to help staff members achieve and increase their potential.  We are giving them the opportunities that I just listed to find satisfaction in helping others.  We can help them believe in themselves and find talents and gifts that they never knew they had.  It is incredibly rewarding to watch a person that was lacking in confidence grow and learn and use what you've taught them.  Watching them pass it on to others is the ultimate satisfaction.
    We have the opportunity for self-improvement and growth as well.  I consider myself a life-long student and love the opportunities I get to interact with staff and dentists from other practices and to attend seminars and get involved in so many aspects of dentistry and practice management. 
    Perhaps, in the long run, the opportunities we make for ourselves and others and the opportunities we take that are presented to us, is what determines our success in life.  You must have the ability to see the opportunities as they arrive.  You must also be able to discern the good opportunities and take them and recognize and resist the bad ones.  Be mature enough not to be greedy.  Pass opportunities on to others to keep the circle of impact in motion.  Check out Ed Brenegar's  post on SWOT today.  He goes into detail about the 4 questions and how they apply in the workplace.  We still have one question to go!  Be back soon.

Monday Blues? No Way!

    Some people don't like Mondays.  They feel like it's back to the old grind.  I like Mondays.  I feel rested after the weekend.  I like my job, most of the time.  I like my co-workers so I'm happy to see them and hear about their weekends.  Mondays are usually busy in a dental office, filled with emergencies from the weekend but that makes it more interesting to me. 
    Today wasn't an easy Monday.  It started out with a difficult exchange with one employee.  Not usually her style so I probed a little and then let it slide.  I expect tomorrow to be better.  I'm not worried about it.  Then a bunch of hygiene cancellations.  What can you do with hygienists who have no patients.....for hours?  I set one up doing a chart audit and the other reactivating patients.  They scheduled nine appointments.  Next the old grouch who was staring at my chest in a post a few weeks ago called and harassed the receptionist.  He will be enlightened at his next appointment.  Nobody messes with our staff.  The receptionist, on the other hand, kept her cool and handled the call.  She didn't like it, but she's a bigger person than him and could rise above his tirade. 
    So did I like this Monday?  At the end of the day, I'd have to say yes.  I got to practice good servant leadership by letting a staff member grumble through without making a big deal out of it.  I didn't like my end of it but I'll live.  Sometimes people need to be grouchy.  The hygienists got to make productive use of their time and helped make the schedule better.  The receptionist got to build her strength in dealing with a difficult patient.  If everything went easy nobody would have been given the opportunity to overcome adversity and grow.  So I liked this Monday.  I wouldn't want them all to be like this, but you have to take 'em when you get 'em.  And just smile and wait for Tuesday.  Because Tuesdays are great!

The Second Question

    Hi, I'm back!  Wow!  Having Ed comment on the first question was an unexpected bonus.  So, now we know that whatever impact we have causes changes.  We also know that the changes can be either good or bad so let's be sure to make them good.
    Question #2 is: Who are we impacting? The answer seems simple, everyone we come into contact with, right?  Yes, but we also impact the people they come in contact with when they leave us.  So, we see that our impact is far-reaching and out of our control at a certain point.  Another reason to make sure it's positive. 
    Does impact in an organization start with the leader?  The leader can influence impact but doesn't always control it.  A poor leader can have people under them with positive strengths that choose to do the right thing because they can do nothing else.  It is easier for positive impact to flow naturally with a positive leader though.  A smart leader will encourage everyone to understand how they are leaders to the people they impact. 
    In a dental practice the dentist and staff impact each other.  They then go on to impact their patients.  Depending on the outcome of treatment, the patients go home comfortable or in pain and impact their families and friends.  Remember, a parent going home after a bad experience can influence how their child feels about going to the dentist for a long time.  Let's say a child sees a parent come home in pain.  Mom is complaining about how much the injection hurt, that she waited forever and then sat some more in the room only to be handled roughly, etc.  You know what I mean.  That child is going to pitch a fit when you get him in the chair.  Now if the parent goes home and seems more comfortable then when they left and raves about how wonderful and gentle the dentist is and how everybody just seems to care...well you get that picture, too.  The child will be more relaxed when he comes for a visit. 
    When patients relay their experience to their friends they will impact them with an impression of your practice.  It may make the friend think about what their last dentist visit was like and make them decide that they want to have the experience that you offer.  Or, they may pick up a negative vibe and when the new neighbor asks for a referral to a dentist they may say "Oh, my dentist isn't taking new patients, but whatever you do, steer clear of Dr. So and So.  My friend just went there and had a terrible time!". 
    So, you are potentially impacting everyone that anyone you come into contact with.  You are creating the reputation of your practice and spreading the word, be it positive or negative.  It's up to you.  It's an awesome responsibility.  Always think of that every morning when you arrive at work.  We are each having a major impact on each other and the people we serve.  Our impact is like a pin ball machine. Our impact is the pin ball and other people are the bumpers.  Once set into motion our impact bounces off everyone onto someone else and at some point is out of our control.
So give that some thought and I'll be back again to explore the third question.

First Question

    I'm back.  Yesterday I suggested you look at the four questions every leader must ask on Ed Brenegar's
    So, number 1- What is our impact?  You can look at that from two perspectives.  What is your impact as a leader and what is our impact as a dental team?  As a leader do you set up trusting relationships with team members and patients?  Do you have good interactions with the staff at other offices that you refer to and who refer to you?  Do you set up the practice so that it is easy for everyone to suceed and are you accessable to patients and staff when needed?  Are you fair, clear in your communications and quick to praise and gentle when correcting?
    As a team, do you look out for one another and help without worrying who gets the recognition.  Do you follow through with patients and make sure they feel cared for?  Do you keep the welfare of the patient as the focus of all you do?  When you are away from the office, in public, do you respect the fact that you represent the practice and behave accordingly? 
    If all your answers to question one are positive, then you get a perfect score for that question.  If not, now you know what you need to work on.  I'll be back soon with question 2. weblog.  I worked closely with Ed when I first became a practice administrator and learned a lot from him.  Let's cover these questions one at a time. 

Four Questions

    Take a look at the four questions that Ed Brenegar says all leaders must ask themselves.  These questions are easy to incorporate into a regular self-examination to keep us focused and effective.  I'll come back soon to look at these questions with you.

Suck It Up!

    Sometimes you just have to suck it up.  Leading is like that.  Actually, sometimes it's all about that.  You don't get the luxuries that the people you lead get.  Like breaks, breakdowns, getting saved from screw-ups, buffering from stress, a shoulder to cry on, a helping hand, a pat on the back or an example to follow.  You are the one who provides those things for others.  Do you get tired?  Sure you do.  Do you get frustrated?  Wouldn't be human if you didn't.  Is it worth it?  You bet!  Why?  What's in it for you?
    You get the opportunity to improve your own strengths while helping the people you lead realize and, by realizing, increase their potential.  You get to watch someone flourish under your guidance.  You get to build relationships with other's that make them want to follow you.  If you serve their needs so that they can perform to their highest capability you will earn their respect and loyalty. 
    If you want to be this type of leader you need the ability to see others as they are and as they can be.  You need the desire to help make someone else look good.  You need the will to worry more about someone else than about yourself.  You need the fortitude to suck it up and deal with whatever comes your way.  No matter how good it gets there will always be problems to solve and deal with.  Accept that and expect it and you will be ready to handle whatever comes your way.